DOGS, COPS, AND DAUGHTERS

"Back in the day" when I used to watch TV I would use it to lull myself to sleep, or to pass the time when I couldn't sleep.  My ex and I divorced in 1992 and the following August I bought a house in Lake Capri, a quiet community of mostly older folks who had moved there in the 1970's and 1980's to retire.  Atlanta suburban sprawl had caught up to this part of Rockdale County and now it was just another suburban neighborhood.  I loved the area with its spring-fed lakes and walking trails, and I liked the house.

My older daughter, a senior in high school, moved in with her father, and my younger daughter stayed with me.  Our house had two bedrooms upstairs that shared a large bathroom and, on the weekends when my older daughter came to stay, the girls could have all the privacy up there they wanted.  The master bedroom was downstairs and I could also have all the privacy I wanted and needed at that time.  The house had a large fenced yard and the girls' two dogs lived back there.  Snoopy and Jodi were two mutts that the girls adopted at the pound when both dogs were just puppies.  Snoopy was a black chow-mix and Jodi was a huge hairy collie-shephard-and-something-else mix.  The dogs were my responsibility (problem) now as they were older and the girls had moved on to bigger and better things.

One winter night I could not sleep and I was channel-surfing, clicking from one station to another, looking for something, anything to watch.  I had put the dogs into our large utility shed because it was going to be below freezing that night.  Melissa was asleep upstairs (or so I thought) and Mary Lee was at her dad's.  I was in the divorcee's typical sexy nighttime outfit - an over-sized tee-shirt and panties.  Click.  Click.  SCREAM.  I jumped and clicked.  One of the channels must have had on a horror movie and I clicked on it just as some poor victim let out a bloodcurdling scream.  It gave me shivers and I made a note to skip that channel if I surfed near it again.  Click.  Click.  What's that?  Boring.  Click.  Click.


Let's change the point of view.  My daughter Melissa, who was 13 or 14 at the time, was upstairs just dozing off when a bloodcurdling scream woke her.  She froze in her bed as the scream was cut off!  MOM!?!  She listened and heard nothing.  O MY GOD!  Had something happened to Mom?  She reached for her phone and pulled it under the covers with her.  9-1-1.  She told the operator that she had heard her mother scream downstairs and she thought someone was in the house.  The operator immediately dispatched two deputies to the address and kept Melissa on the phone.  Was there any way she could get out of the house?  No, the stairs and front door were by her mother's room.  Was her bedroom door locked?  No, yes, maybe, sometimes it didn't lock all the way.  Did she want to check?  No!  She was too scared to even get out of bed.  For all she knew her Mom was dead and someone was coming up the stairs to get her!  The operator tried to calm her and kept her on the phone while the police hurried to our address.




Point of view shift:  Mom is watching some stupid movie or program downstairs totally unaware of what is going on in her daughter's room.  All of a sudden she sees lights dancing on the wall outside of her bedroom door.  Mom rubs her eyes; the lights are still there.  It looks like someone is shining a flashlight through her living room windows.  Holy crap!  Someone is trying to break in!  Mom is terrified!  She mutes the TV and slowly climbs out of bed looking for a weapon.  Nothing!  She tiptoes to her bedroom door and peers around the wall into the living room.  There are two people standing at her front door shining flashlights through the window!  One of them raps on the door and says, "Ma'am!  Police!  Can you come to the door?"


Police?

"Just a minute!" she says.  She stumbles to the door and slides back the latch.  She hears her daughter's bedroom door slam open and her daughter stampedes down the stairs saying, "I'm sorry!  I'm sorry! Mom, I'm so sorry!"

Mom opens the door to the police who are relieved that we are both all right, but supremely aggravated that,  in checking out the house before approaching the front door, they had heard noises around back and opened the utility door.  The two excited dogs had bounded out, jumped all over them, and had run away.  My daughter apologized for calling 9-1-1 and they were very kind to her and told her she did the right thing.  I was mortified to be standing there in an over-sized tee-shirt, wild hair, and clueless.  They apologized for releasing the dogs, and made a halfhearted attempt at rounding them up before they gave up and drove away.  Melissa ran back upstairs and fell asleep.  I put on some sweatpants and a jacket and retrieved the dogs.

KICKIN' BACK IN KENNESAW GEORGIA - AND WITHOUT A GUN

Destinations really make the vacation, don't you think?  A vacation to...say...Trenton, New Jersey...should not be compared to a vacation trip to...Dublin, Ireland.  Not to put Trenton down.  Although, if you read Janet Evanovich's series about an inept but daring bounty hunter in  Trenton, you could then put Trenton down.  Her description is - to say the least - unflattering; however, there must be fun places to visit and fun things to do in  Trenton.  Otherwise, why would anyone live there?

I just returned from my vacation to Covington, Georgia.  My daughter, son-in-law, and grandson (darling Noah - see above left!) live in Covington, Georgia.  We never actually visited or drove by or through the actual TOWN of Covington.  Their mailing address is Covington, but they live in a very rural part of Newton County.  Covington does have a very picturesque town square which you may have seen if you ever watched the TV series In the Heat of the Night starring the now deceased Carroll O'Connor.  My daughters were raised in the neighboring town of Conyers and had occasion to see some of the stars of the series and to actually watch a scene being filmed one time.  Watching a scene being filmed is like watching paint dry; however, meeting celebrities - that was fun!

We were dining in Po' Folks Restaurant** one Christmas season and who should walk in?  Alan Autry!  He played Captain Bubba** Skinner on the series.  My daughter Mary Lee watched every episode of In the Heat of the Night and was enamored of Bubba.  She cried out his name as soon as she saw him.  He was being escorted by our booth and stopped to say hello.  He looked at Melissa's Santa hat, and said, "Nice hat."  Melissa retorted, "Yours, too!"  He was wearing his signature cowboy hat.  He laughed and moved on to his booth.

I did not see any celebrities in rural Newton County or in downtown Conyers this trip.  The weather was cool and crisp, and, although leaves were being blown from the trees, there was still quite a bit of beautiful fall color to enjoy.  I set aside the last two days of vacation so I could spend Saturday and Saturday night with my friend Susan, then drive home to Florida on Sunday.

Susan lives in Kennesaw, Georgia.

Now, if you Google "Kennesaw GA" you will get some basic information links (like the original name of Kennesaw was Big Shanty - - nice - -) and several links that refer to "Gun City".  You see, on May 1, 1982, the city passed a law that required every head of household to "maintain a firearm together with ammunition".  It was passed partly in response to a 1981 handgun ban in Morton Grove, Illinois.  Now before ya'll get all scairt - this law was amended in 1983 to "exempt those who conscientiously object to owning a firearm, convicted felons, those who cannot afford a firearm, and those with a mental or physical disability that would prevent them from owning a firearm".  Phew!  I wonder how many financially disadvantaged conscientious objecting disabled felons purchased firearms before the amendment? 

Another interesting sight to see in Kennesaw is Wildman's Civil War Surplus.  Also known as the "Best Little War House in Kennesaw".  RoadsideAmerica.com describes the shop as being "run by a gun-loving bigot".  Susan has offered (threatened) to take me to Wildman's several times, but, since most gun-loving bigots are misogynistic, too, I've been concerned that I would burst into flames as soon as I entered such a place.  So far I haven't been treated to a visit there.  Even though I was having to enter the city limits of Kennesaw I was still excited about visiting my dear friend Susan.  We always manage to have fun.

A couple hours after I arrived we were sitting around drinking coffee when we heard a big WHUMP and the power went out.  The power stayed out, too; however, it was a sunny and fairly warm day and we didn't need no stinkin' electricity to have fun so we just kept talking.  Susan's boyfriend Karl checked with the neighbors and confirmed the outage was not just us, so we all figured a transformer had blown.  Susan and I decided to go shopping and hopped in my car for the short drive to Wal-Mart.  (Hey, better than Wildman's!).  We got to the neighborhood entrance and found several cars stopped.  Uh-oh.  Maybe it was more than just a blown transformer.  Oh, you bet.  We parked and walked out to the main road.  Looking to the right we saw this truck and this pole tilted and these power lines in the road.  

This is what I could see using my zoom lens.  The pickup is pretty well trashed; that was a camper shell on the back. 












The accident happened "a ways down the road" from Susan's neighborhood, but you can see the lines block the entire street in that direction.

We walked to the left to get this shot - this is what you would see looking left from her neighborhood.  A firetruck had blocked the street and the power guys were shoring up the lines that had been pulled and snapped when the truck hit the other pole.

What is unbelievable - besides the fact that the two people in the truck sustained only minor injuries - is that the truck hit the pole so hard that it BROKE OUT A PIECE OF THE POLE (see behind the left rear wheel?) which then went over the truck and destroyed the camper shell before landing behind the truck.  Speed limit on this street?  35mph.  Driver's story:  He had a sneezing fit and that caused him to floor the gas pedal and swerve into the pole.

Right.

Susan (pictured at left) took a lot of ribbing about the "good time" she was showing me in Kennesaw.  Once the cops decided that we could turn left out of the neighborhood without wildly swerving to the right and plowing into the downed lines, they let us out one by one.  Then the good times really started:  Wal-Mart - didn't have what either of us wanted; however, I did have a snack of 1 (one) Pringle (served on a napkin) with a small swallow of Coke Zero.  I believe that is the only time in my life I have only eaten one chip.  Ever.

Then Susan took me to Kroger where some redneck woman and her son tried to run over us several times in the liquor aisle.  Then she took me to the Dollar store where I picked up Christmas bags really cheap.  It is truly the THOUGHT that counts.  Then she took me to Publix where she introduced me to Bob who had just prepared samples of Greek Tilapia and Greek Cucumber Salad.  Since I hadn't had anything to eat since 10:00am (well, except for that chip and swallow of Coke Zero) and it was almost 4:00pm I was very grateful to Bob for this sample.  I even thanked him after I growled, snatched it from his hand, and stuffed it in my face.

I will admit that Susan later took me to Taco Mac (with her boyfriend Karl and her sister Meloney) and Taco Mac had the best frozen Margaritas I've ever had!  And good food!  And even the Florida State (SEMINOLES) and University of Florida (GATORS) fans hollering at the multiple screens broadcasting the annual rivalry game didn't bother me; in fact, it was like being back at home in Florida.  We did get out before the Georgia-Georgia Tech game started; that would have been too much excitement. And bloodshed.

So my vacation ended on a high note:  power outage, redneck car wreck, Wal-Mart, and football.  Kennesaw.  I'm writing a review for tripadvisor.com and giving Kennesaw a thumbs up!

**Po'Folks Restaurant - yummy Southern cooking including fried green tomatoes, fried chicken, mashed taters with white gravy.  Good eatin'....

**Bubba - not just a rural legend - this name exists and is found frequently south of the Mason Dixon line.